Joy, Pain, and Paradox

Joy, Pain, and Paradox

Kara Holmes
Down syndrome, motherhood, Joy in the Unexpected

I sit here this morning as drops of fresh rain dance upon our aluminum rooftop. The coffee in my mug has gone nearly cold after sitting by my side for a while, but I will remedy that soon enough with a fresh cup from the French press. On the other side of our home, my family still rests. I nursed Alisa in the early hours of the morning, and she sleeps in my bed now, her stomach warmed and full. I carry my bucket to the wellspring of life, drawing the waters of eternal, soul-quenching salvation. I drink of the Living Water of Christ.

Joy Comes with the Morning

Joy Comes with the Morning

Kara Holmes
Down syndrome, Joy in the Unexpected

Have you ever experienced that unnerving feeling in your spirit that something isn’t right? No matter how hard you try to ignore it or to snuff it out, the feeling is persistent and insistent. 

I hate that feeling. 

Last week, I loaded Alisa in the minivan and took her to an appointment with a pediatric ophthalmologist. We had been waiting to see a doctor for her eyes. For the last month or so, we noticed that Alisa’s eyesight did not seem to be what we’d expect at this point. Lack of eye contact and little eye tracking were among the other outward symptoms prompting that feeling of discomfort to arise within me. As a parent, I’m not sure anything is more unnerving than realizing something might not be working correctly with your child’s eyes. 

The Question God Will Answer

Kara Holmes
Christianity, suffering

In the summer of 2003, I served as a summer missionary at a church plant in Manhattan. While the distance of time has caused many details from that summer to diminish in my memory, one experience stands out to me after all of these years. It was a hot July day, and we were doing an outreach event in a park on the Upper Westside. As the event was in progress, I stood on the outskirts observing our group interact with others when I noticed a man up on a hill that overlooked the park. Dressed in biker’s gear, he stood straddling his bike as he watched our event with curiosity.