I watched as they gracefully walked across the freshly fallen snow. A fawn pranced ahead of the group, bounding into the air effortlessly and landing softly upon the powder. They came to the edge of the field and stopped, cautiously listening for any sound of danger. Slowly, they walked into the field in front of my in-law’s country home and approached the deer feeder. A fire roared in the fireplace to my right, crackling and popping and sizzling with warmth and energy, and I enjoyed the serene beauty of nature - the life before me, around me, beside me. Alisha slept peacefully on a pillow, tummy full from her first morning meal.

But then, the deer froze. Their muscles taut, their ears back, listening, waiting. They would turn toward the line of trees and wait, ready to bound into the safety of cover if the need arouse. After a few moments of intense listening, they went back to grazing in the field. This cycle continued as the deer ate, occasionally freezing in fear and listening for any sign of danger. Go on, little deer, it’s ok. There is no danger here, I urged in my thoughts. I knew they were safe, but the deer did not. “Skittish little animals, aren’t they?” I asked my husband between sips of hot coffee as we both stared out the window. 

“It’s how they survive,” he shrugged matter-of-factly.

 I understand that, I thought. And the morning rolled on lazily…

Several weeks ago, I shared with my friends and family a blog post on the outcome of our pregnancy with our second-born daughter Alisa. I titled that post When God Says No, detailing our journey of prayer and faith for Alisa's life and health, finding out in the end that she does in fact have Down syndrome. What I did not anticipate was how our story would spread so quickly as a result of this blog post. Largely, the response was positive. Many of you could relate to our journey because you, too, have had a similar experience with your child, family member, or friend. Others responded because you were drawn to the honesty of praying to the Lord with desperate prayers, only to find in the end that He said "no" or answered in ways much different than you desired. Whatever the reason, God has used our journey to bring together thousands of people who have wondered at the mysterious ways of God's work in our lives. 

I was, however, contacted by some who did not resonate with my message of faith in a Supreme God who said "no" to my prayers.